Top Wedding Etiquette Trends for 2014
Emily Post herself would frown upon some of the modern day etiquette faux pas that occur when couples plan their weddings. The Post family name is synonymous with appropriate behavior and proper etiquette, and it has been for more than 80 years. Post’s great-great-granddaughter, Lizzie Post, is the co-author of the book, Emily Post’s Etiquette, 18th Edition, has followed her great-great-grandmother’s footsteps to become an etiquette expert helping couples figure out what’s appropriate and what’s not in terms of modern day wedding traditions.
Like everything else in life, as the years pass, traditions change. What your grandmother considered appropriate for a wedding might not be considered appropriate anymore. For example, more and more couples are electing to pay for their own wedding today than in the past when it was expected that the bride’s family would pay for the couple’s nuptials. Gone are the days when couples chose to wed in the spring and holiday weddings were unheard of. Couples today aren’t even concerned with getting married on the traditional Saturday. Traditions change, but proper etiquette doesn’t. Learn what’s expected of you prior to attending another wedding.
Choosing the right gift to give to a couple is a challenge at times. Gift registries are meant to make the gift buying process simple, but it’s rarely ever black and white when it comes to purchasing registry gifts. Typically, couples are expected to register for items in all price ranges to provide each guest a comfortable range from which to choose a gift. However, the number of couples who marry later in life and/or choose to live together prior to marriage already have most of the household items many couples choose to register for.
Don’t be surprised to see couples registering for other items, instead, such as honeymoons. It’s no longer uncommon to see a honeymoon registry on which guests have the option of paying for a dinner, a night at a hotel, a flight, a massage on a couple’s honeymoon or even more practical items like our own Wedding Gown Preservation Kit. Additionally, it’s always acceptable to provide money as a gift. Just be sure to do so in the form of a check.
Smart phones make it possible for anyone to take a picture, post a photo and have it viewed by hundreds in a matter of minutes. This is something a number of couples find disturbing on their wedding day. Why? Because most couples don’t want their wedding photos all over the internet and social media sites without their approval. Please be respectful of couples and either turn off your phones or put them away during their wedding. Any photos you take should not be posted to any social media accounts until you’ve obtained permission from the couple – or until their professional wedding pictures have been released.
Furthermore, do not find it offensive if you enter a wedding venue to find a sign asking you to turn off your phones and put them away during the ceremony. Couples do not want to have phones ringing as they are exchanging their vows.
In the past it was traditional for couples to wed in their church. Today, however, more and more couples find it appropriate to wed in a location sentimental to them. It might be in a location where they first met or first kissed. It might be in a location where they were engaged. It might be in the garden, in a restaurant, or in a hotel. Wherever couples wed, attend their wedding with a smile and no comment about how the groom’s grandmother might feel if she were around to see him wed in a hotel rather than in the church she regularly attended her entire life.
Traditions change and weddings are often in other locations; embrace it and accept it. It might not be the only aspect of the wedding that isn’t up to traditional standards. You might notice that menus, music and even décor differ from what was the norm and what was acceptable in the past.
At one time it was customary for bridal showers to include only the bride and her female counterparts while the men went off for a bachelor party. Today, many couples choose to have a co-ed bridal shower with a fun theme, such as a stocking the bar theme in which guests bring only different types of wine or mixers to give to the couple. Additionally, women are taking part in bachelorette festivities by planning their own night out or weekend away. Some couples even choose to have a joint bachelor/bachelorette party with their closest friends.
Change is a good thing. Time has a way of making many changes in life, but what it cannot change is the joy and celebration felt when a couple decides to marry. Don’t let changing times and changing traditions keep you from enjoying the wedding of your loved ones. Embrace the change and celebrate the beginning of a new family.